Photojournal starts today.
This is from Charleston. It's boring but I like the calmness.
Yesterday it was brought to my attention just how sinful my heart is. I was talking to some friends a few nights ago, and I confessed something I had done. But the ugly thing is that I was proud of it.
I got home and opened my Bible, disgusted at myself. I painfully identified with, "out of the overflow of the heart the mouth speaks." And I came across this Psalm:
Blessed is he whose transgressions are forgiven,
Whose sins are covered.
Blessed is the man whose sin the Lord does not count against him and in whose spirit is no deceit.
When I kept silent, my bones wasted away through my groaning all day long.
For day and night your hand was heavy upon me;
My strength was sapped as in the heat of summer.
Then I acknowledged my sin to you and did not cover up my iniquity.
I said, "I will confess my transgressions to the Lord--"
And you forgave the guilt of my sin.
Therefore let everyone who is godly pray to you while you may be found;
Surely when the mighty waters rise, they will not reach him.
You are my hiding place;
You will protect me from trouble and surround me with songs of deliverance.
I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go.
I will counsel you and watch over you.
Do not be like the horse or the mule, which have no understanding but must be controlled by bit and bridle or they will not come to you.
Many are the woes of the wicked, but the Lord's unfailing love surrounds the man who trusts in him.
Rejoice in the Lord and be glad, you righteous;
Sing, all you who are upright in heart!
I love all the enveloping phrases... "surround me with songs of deliverance" describes exactly where I want to be, ya know?
And what a joy that we find this enveloping love of God when we unveil our weakness to Him.
I think the church could stand to be way more forgiving. I have found myself so afraid of making mistakes, and when I do make them I make a frenzied attempt at covering them up. So then we live in false fellowship, and that's not beneficial to anybody. Vulnerability and sharing in the sanctification experience, please!!
That's all. This is probably really vague and nonsensical, but whatevs.
With love and songs of deliverance,
Megan
