I'm so thankful for the way Scripture refreshes. When I spend time away from it, I get that weak feeling... that feeling I get when I'm too lazy to pack healthy lunches for work and consequently eat nothing but fast food all day... that dehydrated, malnourished, alive-but-not-living-well feeling.
And then I come back to Scripture, and it's like everything falls into place again. This is the way things are supposed to be. God speaks, and I am filled with truth.
While those times away from God's Word are not good, I do return with a certain thirst for it, the kind that results only from separation. Even the simplest words of truth completely alter my perspective.
That's how I'm feeling today... I'm just skimming across the Old Testament, taking in all the goodness of God, His faithfulness to Israel over and over and over again, even when they were so unfaithful. Every instance of His faithfulness strikes me because I know it so well. He is so good to me when I am selfish to the core.
The end.
With love and such,
Megan
In the past two days, I have experienced so much wonderfulness from my co-workers, who also happen to be dear friends.
This wonderfulness includes a fun manager-approved Dunkin Donuts run, conversations with funny fake accents that maybe went too far (a customer was abruptly greeted with a "HALLO!"), the image of a VERY awkward dance to Earth, Wind and Fire seared into my brain, and lots of hearty laughs in the midst of a very busy and stressful two days.
In short, I love the people I work with. A lot, a lot, a lot, times infinity.
Also on the list of people I think are great: two ladies who sent me Christmas cards with really personal messages (both of which made me cry, and I don't really cry a lot). I'm so thankful to know so many talented and strong ladies and to share life and adventures with them.
Now I have a decorated tree and I am watching The Holiday until I drift off into a deep sleep. I will wake up whenever my littlest brother bursts into my room and declares it is time for me to get up. This usually happens around 7.
And I am so thankful for Jesus. What a beautiful Savior. I can't even wrap my mind around it. And meditating on Him and His birth these past few weeks has been so refreshing.
With love and joy,
Megan
It's starting to set in that I'm leaving for two years. It is scaring the CRAP out of me.
I think it would have been easier to bolt right out of college, but now that I've settled into a full-time job and doing a lot more with my church and spending lots of time with RDU friends, I have become comfortable. And I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that I'm called to this writing/photo job (so many things have been orchestrated over the past 8 months or so). It's just going to be really, really, really hard.
I try to focus on what I'm moving toward, not what I'm leaving behind. This is primarily because the thought of leaving my family, my dearest friends and my work-family makes me weep. (No hyperbole here.) I know I will have to face it, and it will SUCK. But I just can't. Not until I have to. Oh darn, now I'm thinking about it and here come the waterworks.
Two years is a long time.
In other news, I decorated my planner through the beginning of February. That always makes me happy. And I cleaned my room a bit. I need a haircut. I need to take photos for my prayer cards. I need to chill out and stop thinking of more things I need to do.
Also, I got a Christmas card today that was super encouraging, and it made me cry. Of course it's from a new, wonderful friend whom I am just getting to know and have to leave in January! Baaah!
With love and trying not to be too sentimental,
Megan
Maybe it's the fact that I watched Once last night, or maybe it's the fact that I'm feeling inspired, or maybe I'm just bored. But I realized this afternoon how much I miss making music.
In high school I studied and practiced piano and music theory. I was in every choral group our school offered, and I went to NC honors chorus. Music was the thing that drove me, it was a source of energy and peace. It was magical and beautiful.
My last year of college I took voice lessons. It was freeing and difficult and caused me to come out of my shell and let my voice resonate through a concert hall. It felt incredible. And then I graduated and stopped really singing.
Now I just absentmindedly sing in my car. I have accumulated a library of songs on my ipod that makes me feel good, and I can select an album that fits my mood, and that is that.
I used to sit at the piano and hammer away at difficult lines of classical songs. I would plunk out right-hand, left-hand, and finally the slow-and-painful combination of the two until my muscle memory became so fluent that I could breathe deeply, even close my eyes for a moment, and let the music envelop me.
Now I sit at a piano and feel like I never knew how to play at all.
So I guess this is my way of saying I'm going to try to play and make music again.
With love and song,
Megan
If you want to see a little of what I love to do:
with love and our project winning CPOY silver (woo!),
Megan
today.
i poured my heart out to God, crying in my car, in the rain.
i laughed with my fantastic co-workers about random things.
i met with a lovely friend who is going to do so many beautiful things with her life.
i learned how freeing it is to move on. i will get there fully.
i got upset that i don't have a boy who cares about me that way.
i sang.
i sang some more.
i got a milkshake.
and i am going to get a full night's sleep.
days like this make me feel really alive.
with love and listening to ingrid michaelson (always wonderful and optimistic),
Megan
I just woke up from a three-hour nap I did not intend to take.
So this evening will be filled with laundry, reading, hot tea, sermon-listening and restless sleep till I wake up at 6 tomorrow. woohoo!
The fact that I'm moving away is starting to freak me out. Maybe it's the fact that I have two months left at home. Or maybe it's just that I'm really happy with life right now. I love the people in it, and I'm getting to know new friends better, and I'm realizing how much I really need my best and oldest friends.
It's hard to find a balance between loving people without reservation, but also allowing myself to be flexible, mobile, somewhat detached. I've always hated the idea of holding back love in the name of self-preservation. But it's going to hurt so much to rip myself away from everything I know.
And that makes me think of this quote that I need to have cross-stitched on a pillow or tattooed on my arm or something:
"To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything, and your heart will certainly be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact, you must give your heart to no one, not even to an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements; lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket-- safe, dark, motionless, airless-- it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable." -C.S. Lewis
That would be a really long tattoo. Cross-stitching, it is.
With love and not getting anything productive done today (yet!),
Megan
Greensboro always makes me think about what I want to do with my life.
On the list of things to ponder:
Do I want to settle in the U.S.?
Do I want to live in an ever-bustling, trendy and exciting city or out in the country where I can own land and run around in the woods and build a treehouse for my kids?
Do I want to adopt? (I think the answer will be yes.)
On the list of things to do in the next two months:
Read up on American history
Read up on Czech history
Start learning Czech
Learn how to do my makeup
On the list of things to do in the next few years:
Live in CZ
Live in Sweden?
Find a dateable boy
Make my life count for something big.
with love and lists,
Megan
I went to campus tomorrow and went to the music building practice rooms and just sang and played piano?
I don't want to be one of those graduates that just friggin' can't let go of being a student and therefore stalks around campus being all creepy and old.
But for reals. I miss Chapel Hill/Carrboro.
I google imaged "creepy old student" and THIS came up. Really?!?!
On the list of things to accomplish tomorrow:
FIX MY BUDGET. Holy crap. I haven't kept track of it at all for the past, oh, two weeks.
Go to the dentist. Hope I don't have any crazy problems. It's been about two years... eek!
Read a bunch while visiting Cafe Driade for what I'm expecting to be a pretty fantastic latte.
Wear fun clothes that I can't normally wear to work under a bright florescent 'avert your eyes' orange t-shirt.
With love and weird ominous swollen lymph nodes,
Megan
I hopped out of my car at Starbucks, eagerly anticipating coffee and the new Swell Season album. I wore my boots for the first time this fall, and as I click-clicked down the sidewalk, I admired the cloudy fall weather and contemplated my impending coffee purchase. As I walked toward the door, I saw a man with a long beard sitting at an outdoor table. Interrupting my coffee thoughts (pumpkin spice latte or peppermint mocha? Is it too early for a peppermint mocha? I don't want to get tired of them before December) came an abrupt question from the man at the table.
"You're a Christian, aren't you?"
I was startled. I thought he might have seen the Ichthus on the back of my car, but my car was around the corner.
"What?" I managed to blurt out.
"A born-again believer. A Christian."
"Oh... yes, why do you ask?"
"Something about you, your mannerisms, when you walked by, I could tell."
I was completely taken aback. I didn't know what to say. He went on to say that he went to church nearby, and he spoke about how God equips us all with different gifts, and that they need to be exercised. He told me not to be afraid to speak truth into the lives of other people.
Mainly, I just nodded my head. Normally, these kinds of situations would freak me out. But oddly enough, I was incredibly encouraged. He let me go on my way (and first prayed for me), but I was just so surprised by that encounter. I think he's part of a church whose character is much different than that of
my church, but his words were full of scripture and humility. I was just really glad to have that conversation with a total stranger.
Currently watching: Once. Very halloween-appropriate, huh?
Obsessively listening to: The Swell Season's new album. Beauuuuty.
Currently wanting: to be more confident in sharing what I believe. I fear misrepresenting the Gospel/appearing ignorant. SO much. There is so much I don't know or understand.
Currently reading: Crazy Love by Francis Chan. It's pretty fantastic.
with love and an uneventful halloween (except for that I dressed up as a gangster rapper yesterday with dreds and all, that was pretty fun, except apparently I looked more like Avril Lavigne... fail...),
Megan
"This is what I was made to do."
I've never had that feeling before. Ever. During college, I always second-guessed my choices of majors. (Photojournalism and psychology? Really, you're going to find a job with that dynamic duo?)
I didn't really want to work for a newspaper. I didn't really want to do weddings forever (as much as I love them, I just don't feel a strong passion that will keep me in that field for very long). I wasn't sure about pursuing counseling, because that's a lot of schoolin' and money for a job I'm not sure I want to do forever.
This week, all doubt is removed from my mind regarding what I will be doing for the next two years, and maybe beyond.
Job title: writer/editor/photographer
Location: the Czech Republic
The job itself is going to be freakin' incredible. And beyond that, God has totally put European peoples on my heart recently. I think eventually I would like to be in Stockholm. But for the next two years, Praha, I'm yours.
Fact of the day: the Czech Republic is the most atheistic country in Europe. With its turbulent history, I am a bit overwhelmed.
This week I had the privilege of meeting a lot of really great girls and guys with the same heart for the nations. I've never experienced anything like it, and this diversity-loving lady was PSYCHED to see God orchestrate their passions and destinations.
I am way excited about the days to come. But way sad to think that in three months I have to say hundreds of goodbyes.
with love and purpose,
Megan
Baaah I leave for conference in two days!!!
To do:
Budget for these next two weeks, pay off credit card and take into account the fact that I will be without a week of income!
Read, read, read, read like a maniac!
Laundry!
Pack!
Travel playlist!
Go to work!
Oh boy.
And when I come back, I run ten miles! I have proven to myself that I CAN make it this far, so I'm way stoked.
With love and excitement,
Megan
To be honest, few things really offend me. But this made me furious all day long.
A customer came in to the store today with an iMac that didn't work. He told me he worked for a particular church. I told him that we do repairs by appointment basis, and that I could book him the next available appointment in two hours.
Initiate freakout. This customer went on a self-entitled rant how an appointment system is stupid, how Apple doesn't care about its customers, and then proceeded to call his co-worker and loudly give a diatribe (making sure I could hear him) about how I was being "snooty."
Of course, he eventually calmed down and took the earliest available appointment, and made a weak attempt to cover himself ("You were just doing your job... but Apple is just practicing bad business, blah blah blah")
So he went on his merry way, and I was totally angry. It's one thing for a customer to be rude-- this happens on a very regular basis. But for you to tell me that you work on LEADERSHIP at a CHURCH, and then proceed to loudly insult me on the phone to your friend... that is NOT okay.
What an awful representation of the gospel. I hate that people experience this all the time, because it is not fair, and it is not Christ. I know we're imperfect people and we are inevitably going to be somewhat hypocritical because we represent a holy God... but come on. You've gotta work harder than giving childish tirades when your wants are not immediately accommodated.
Just a rant. I'm done now.
With love and wanting to make a t-shirt that says "be nice,"
Megan
My best friend is engaged!!!!!! It's about freakin time :)
We are some high-class broads. This picture was taken like 5 years ago; perhaps we've matured since then?
Nah.
Also, I was a second-shooter for a wedding this past weekend. It was nice to shoot again for the first time in a month or so. Maybe one day I will format photos for web. Instead, they are a bit washed out. Oops!
I know a lot of people don't like reception photos because of low light and such. But I think reception photos are my favorites!! I love how everyone loosens up and becomes more expressive and comfortable. Including myself, because I don't have to worry about being a distraction during the ceremony or posing shots. I can just walk around and have fun and document.
(He spun her around. It was adorable.)
Fin.
With love and now my text is centered but I'm way too lazy to do anything about it,
Megan
I know I'll be ok.
I went through a lot of crap this summer. It was all self-inflicted. And God is mercifully showing me just how broken I am, and how beloved I am. And, even when things look entirely bleak and miserable, they do get better!
And what an inexplicable joy it is to now be in pursuit of God instead of running from Him, to actually reciprocate in this love-relationship with Him. And I'm starting to feel a refreshed love for Europe and for the gospel and for life. God, help me to remember how much I need You.
I can't wait for candidate conference!
With love and books (I have made far too many book purchases this week),
Megan
I keep starting the beginnings of blog posts, but then I save them as drafts and move on.
I feel as though I have nothing very important to say.
Currently, I am feeling: a bit overwhelmed, a bit unprepared, a bit sentimental because I know my time at home is winding down.
I feel the need to read anything that comes into my path. My thoughts and insights are not enough, and I am hungry for perspective and diversity.
Bleh!
I hope you enjoyed reading this mix of incoherent sentences.
With love and new glasses,
Megan
And... breathe.
This photo reminds me of Alice (in Wonderland). Looking up through the daisies-- you know.
Today I ran nine miles.
Today I fell more in love with little old North Raleigh and its farms and fields and horses and curvy roads.
Today I watched too many episodes of the O.C.
Today I listened to a sermon on the majesty of God. I am praying for awareness.
This week I was encouraged by a new friend who has recently been through the primary thing I am struggling with right now. To hear someone convincingly say, "You can do it!" and to check up with me through the week nearly brings me to tears. To overcome this thing that has burdened my heart all summer would be such a great victory.
It's something I have to let go, but I don't want to.
With love and hope,
Megan
Notes to self:
don't wish summer away.
don't wish your singleness away.
don't wish your time in the States away.
I am having such a difficult time with submission lately. I KNOW that my response to God's love for me should be to abandon all the selfish crap I cling to and immerse myself in loving God. But, for some reason, I feel like I can't. I feel really weak and rebellious and I hate it.
I wish it was easier to trust.
Note to self: find the thin line between discipline and beating yourself up over things.
With love and wanting to hike in the mountains and/or live inside this photo please,
Megan
I may or may not be out living it up and doing something terribly exciting.
I also may or may not be sitting in the little haven that is the room above the garage, watching The Sound of Music whilst editing photos, reading about Prague and cutting out pages from old issues of Real Simple, Domino and J. Crew catalogues to paste in my planner.
Great things that happened this week:
- I got the official invitation to October's Candidate Conference (next step to Eastern Europe! Pure joy for something to finally be set in stone!)
- I got medical insurance!
- I went to the first week of Financial Peace University and started budgeting. I haven't yet torn my hair out from the frustration that normally ensues when I think too hard about finances, so I consider this a small victory.
Very sad things that happened this week:
- It's starting to hit me that two years is a very long time to be away from everyone I know and love.
- My great-grandfather, who was one of the most interesting and eloquent men I have ever met, died yesterday. He had a stroke this week that left him unable to speak, which broke my heart more than anything, because my favorite thing to do when our family got together for Christmas, Easter, July 4, etc. was to listen to him. His prayers before meals were beautiful and proper, and his stories were always compelling and full of hilarious dry humor. Grandpa Fred was English, served in Britain's Royal Air Force, and because of industrialization was itching to get out of London. One thing that I loved about him was that he remembered me and the fact that I love Europe. After I returned from Italy, he was always urging me to read The Broker (by John Grisham, I think?) because it took place in Italy, and it made him think of me. I don't typically expect relatives in their 80s to remember my name, much less the fact that I love Italy and I speak Italian, so I would know some of the phrases that most people wouldn't understand in John Grisham's book. He was very thoughtful, and I am going to miss him so much.
Of course, his death also got my head spinning. How fortunate I am to be alive and, (God willing) to have years and years ahead of me to have adventures that I will one day tell my grandchildren about.
With love and making plans to train my children to sing like the Von Trapps,
Megan
Sometimes I wish I could live multiple lives. I wish I could experience all facets of humanity for myself. I want my life to be a hodgepodge of adventure and joy and hurt and beauty and grittiness and poverty and peace, but I know I'll need some stability-- I'll want to nest. Maybe one day I'll be ready for that.
This photo from
The Selby (love of my life/time waster to the max) makes me wish I lived a rugged, rural lifestyle (even though I know this is in NYC...) I just love the texture and the earthiness of this office.
And then so much of me wants to live in Sweden for some amount of time, because everyone is so friendly and happy, and everything is stylish and beautiful. People carry themselves differently there.
I want to live life in the city and out in nature. I want to be a nomad and a good wife. I don't want to grow bored.
Also, Psalm 105 is wonderful, and it chronicles the goodness of God to His people and I love it.
with love and dreams and scripture,
Megan
One thing that upsets me is when people don't realize their worth.
Especially when they are obviously brilliant.
I just want to make uninterrupted eye contact and ask, "Do you even know how valuable you are?"
It rips me up. I don't quite know why.
With love and rain,
Megan
Umm, could I live here, please?
Right now I'm sitting on my floor. I am le tired. And I'm praying that God will meet my financial needs for the fall.
I'm excited, because I am running a 10-mile race in late October with some wonderful ladies from my Bible Study. I think it will be really good to have a tangible fitness goal like this, plus I'll be running in lovely Durham during the lovely fall. Although I'm sure I'll be huffing and puffing and whatnot. So I'm starting training tomorrow morning!
Thing is, this race cost $42 to run, I need to buy a good pair of running shoes (which will put me back about $60). Plus I'm probably taking a 13-week financial class at church, which will be $100, and I'm just not sure about this whole grownup moneymaking/spending thing.
I wish things didn't cost so dang much.
But right now I will lay in bed and read The Time Traveler's Wife and get up at 7 a.m. and run like the wind.
Run, Forrest, Run.
With love and goals,
Megan
I will not waste time on technology that does not benefit my life. This means not checking Facebook without purpose and checking e-mail once a day (unless there's something pressing).
When I am bored, I will do something productive. I will read or write or memorize scripture or paint or go running or do something worth doing.
I will memorize more scripture.
I will be committed to God and work work work to stop being so stubborn and selfish.
I will embrace the seriousness of my future job abroad as well as the adventurous side. I am here to serve and pour out myself, not check off amazing life experiences.
Also learn to manage my money! Hooray!
With love and a day off tomorrow (phew!),
Megan
Because my little corner of the internet is for me, really. And I like getting things out into words.
My room is clean. That never happens. And I've finally hung up my string of flower lights, and I can see the floor, and life is good.
I finished The Unbearable Lightness of Being. Sometimes I thought it was brilliant, and sometimes I thought Czech authors are weird.
Now I'm reading The Time Traveler's Wife so I can go and watch it having read the book, even though the book will be better than the movie.
I am a firm believer in using images to tell a story (Hi, My name is Megan, and I'm a photojournalism major), but I think that descriptive words often help you imagine a place or a feeling better than an image can. The image just lays it out in front of you, but words immerse you and make you construct an image in your head. You're actually there-- you build the setting around yourself. I have this eerie image of the moors of England because I read The Hound of the Baskervilles, and in my mind I stood and watched events unfold upon the dark, dewy, foggy, lonely moors of England. But I don't think that you could ever recreate that image in my mind by showing me a photograph or a movie clip, no matter how foggy and eerie and mysterious it looked.
I like books.
With love and string lights,
Megan
I feel like my blogging is just white internet noise. I don't really care to read what I've written after I've written it.
Either that or I go on a diatribe, preaching at myself.
Neither of which are really beneficial to post online.
Hm.
I'm a total photojournal failure. I just don't have time at the moment. Maybe 5 photos a week?
This summer has been really sweet. Lots of beach trips, visiting new places (Charleston, I love you!) and lots of days lounging by the pool with lovely friends.
Now as everyone preps to go back to school (which includes a lot of my post-grad friends, because they're all teachers!) I am coming to realize things will never be quite the same again. Everyone's making these huge life transitions-- getting married, moving across the country, starting full-time jobs-- and I will be out of the country, probably by March.
This fall is going to be especially hard because I don't have a fresh semester of classes ahead of me. I'm a nerd, and I really like going to school. I like the Target run for school supplies, the purchasing of hundreds of dollars worth of textbooks, the syllabi, the rush of motivation at the beginning of the semester that only lasts about two weeks. It's like some weird academic high for me, and it's really sad to me that I'm not doing it anymore. At least not for a few years.
But hopefully I will be working more, and watching as my dear friends find jobs and start doing what they love. Throw in some trips to the mountains during the fall, some pretty scarves and crisp fall air, and I think I'll be able to look past the fact that I'm done with school.
With love and autumn approaching,
Megan
This photo is cut off but I'm too lazy to fix it.
The ocean is the most soothing/invigorating thing in the world to me. I could just lay in the sun, covered in salt water with sand in my hair, indefinitely.
Sometimes I wish I could take a picture just with my eyes-- without having to crop anything out. Last week I was lying on the beach on my stomach, with my head cradled in my arm. I opened my eyes to see my hair reflecting the sun,and beyond my hair was the shoreline, dotted with umbrellas. I wanted to photograph it, but I could never get the same shot unless I threw my hair in front of the lens and fashioned my arm around the camera to get the silhouette of my arm framing the image.
I think sometimes when I'm taking photographs, it takes me out of the experience. It's as if I'm not really there, that I'm watching the world through a documenting device, not experiencing that thing for myself.
Just thoughts. I want to go to the beach.
With love and still craving Krispy Kreme,
Megan
Photojournal, you are a big step for me.
These photos aren't very exciting. I need to do better at taking my camera with me places. And taking photos of people. I haven't done that since I graduated! I suck at life.
With love and a day off (finally),
Megan
You see what I did there?
This photo is a combination of dying flowers in my room and my ghettofabulous lamp which right now consists of a stand and a bare lightbulb.
Weird shadows.
shadows!, originally uploaded by Farfalla Fiorentina.
Tax-free weekend might be the death of me.
I bought Pumas today. They make my ginormo feet look tiny.
I want Krispy Kreme like right now.
With love and going to bed at 10:00 on a Saturday like an old, old grandma,
Megan
Photojournal starts today.
This is from Charleston. It's boring but I like the calmness.
Yesterday it was brought to my attention just how sinful my heart is. I was talking to some friends a few nights ago, and I confessed something I had done. But the ugly thing is that I was proud of it.
I got home and opened my Bible, disgusted at myself. I painfully identified with, "out of the overflow of the heart the mouth speaks." And I came across this Psalm:
Blessed is he whose transgressions are forgiven,
Whose sins are covered.
Blessed is the man whose sin the Lord does not count against him and in whose spirit is no deceit.
When I kept silent, my bones wasted away through my groaning all day long.
For day and night your hand was heavy upon me;
My strength was sapped as in the heat of summer.
Then I acknowledged my sin to you and did not cover up my iniquity.
I said, "I will confess my transgressions to the Lord--"
And you forgave the guilt of my sin.
Therefore let everyone who is godly pray to you while you may be found;
Surely when the mighty waters rise, they will not reach him.
You are my hiding place;
You will protect me from trouble and surround me with songs of deliverance.
I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go.
I will counsel you and watch over you.
Do not be like the horse or the mule, which have no understanding but must be controlled by bit and bridle or they will not come to you.
Many are the woes of the wicked, but the Lord's unfailing love surrounds the man who trusts in him.
Rejoice in the Lord and be glad, you righteous;
Sing, all you who are upright in heart!
I love all the enveloping phrases... "surround me with songs of deliverance" describes exactly where I want to be, ya know?
And what a joy that we find this enveloping love of God when we unveil our weakness to Him.
I think the church could stand to be way more forgiving. I have found myself so afraid of making mistakes, and when I do make them I make a frenzied attempt at covering them up. So then we live in false fellowship, and that's not beneficial to anybody. Vulnerability and sharing in the sanctification experience, please!!
That's all. This is probably really vague and nonsensical, but whatevs.
With love and songs of deliverance,
Megan
Starting tomorrow. Photojournal. Every day. At least one photo.
I started to do this in Intermediate Photo, but then dropped the class and dropped the goal.
Here's to following through and maybe organizing my life a bit.
With love and a new dress,
Megan
Here is an abbreviated version of an update on my life.
1. God is wonderful, and he causes me to heal. I totally resonate with the dozens of Psalms that say something along the lines of, "I called to Him, and He answered me." He totally rescued me from myself.
2. I have been working more recently. Getting out of the house and being productive is great for my life. Sitting around the house gets me in a very awful mood. I need to be out DOING things. Dad and I discussed this, and he is the same way.
3. Get me to Prague. Like now. I'm so ready!
3b: But I need to be where I am now. Emily and I talked about this. Don't wish your life away.
4. JOY BLINSON, I MEAN PRICE, IS TOTALLY A MOM! CANNOT EVEN BELIEVE IT.
5. My lenses have been sitting at Southeastern Camera for like 2 weeks because I don't have the money to pay for their repairs to get them back. I hate money!!!!
6. I'm going to Charleston with some lovely girls this weekend. Cannot wait!
With love and bad skin (for reals, shouldn't this have ended by 11th grade!?),
Megan
Bonus Features:
Quote that sums up my life right now: "Yay! After all this time of hating them, we like boys!" -Rachel
For real. Someone stole my future sunflowery-yellow-outdoorsy-with-twinkle-lights-around-dusk wedding. Like, all of it. Only mine will be slightly more colorful with slightly fewer sunflowers.
That's pretty much the only difference.
That whole blog is just full of eye candy. I'm a fan.
With love and weddings (Mary Hannah got married today, yaaaay!!),
Megan
Sometimes you just need a happy summer collage to lift your spirits. And a scone from Great Harvest bakery.
(Those hairpins in the first photo: I will one day buy them and wear them always)
Things that are getting me through this rut:
-Thoughts of Prague, even if I won't get there until next March
-Reading through Proverbs with my church and small group
-The color yellow
-Going outside
-Coffee
-Thoughts of visiting Scandinavia
-Keeping a mindset of freedom.
Right now I'm living at home, which I thought I could handle, but it's driving me crazy. I'm used to being constantly on the move at college, living in my own apartment and keeping my own schedule without a lot of worry about money.
Now I'm constrained by my falling-apart-car and lack of income, and I know I'm putting stress on my family financially as I'm having to spend my little income on photo equipment repairs, etc.
And I have to keep telling myself, just think about freedom. Think about how you'll have an incredible job, albeit six months from now. Think about how you will be living on your own in a new country.
With love and praying I can somehow come up with the money to take a Czech class this fall,
Megan
Right now, I feel like
David after the Dentist. Sluggish and in a blur and, "Why is this haaappening to me? Is this gonna be forever?"
I'm generally a happy person. But this week, I am just in a rut. I talked to God about it. It was strange for me to just say to Him the words, "I'm sad." And it sucks not to be able to control how I feel. I'm sad about things I cannot change, things that shouldn't matter to me anymore.
It doesn't help that I'm probably going to be in Raleigh till January, which is longer than I originally planned.
So I'm doing what I can to take my mind off of things. Right now that looks like hot tea and reading some Milan Kundera (sketchy, but brilliant).
With love and a bit of heaviness,
Megan
I do not know where to draw the line between being vulnerable and sharing tooo much information on my little ole blog.
I'll post something, then come back later and be all, "really, Megan? Was that necessary?"
Working on it!
With love and new Sharpies that said on the shelf $3 but were actually $12 when I got to the register and I was too embarrassed to put them back (darn you Wal*Mart!),
Megan
I have feverishly been editing weddings and designing albums for Annie for the past few days. I never realized that wedding photo editing would be nearly as exhausting as photo story editing. Here's a wee bit of what's to come!
And let me know what you think about the beginnings-of-a-logo-that-I-drew-myself-so-it's-really-not-all-that-incredible above!
With love and new things,
Megan
(I went to the Farmer's Market on Saturday. It was magical. Like in the ranks with Disney World. I just think there's something so earthy and beautiful about farmers bringing together produce that they planted, nurtured and harvested from their own land.)
This evening has been dedicated to trying to figure out a design/theme and logo for my website and blog.
It's the first step in my "Don't Be Afraid of Failure" plan. Today I finished editing photos from the second wedding I ever shot. They weren't stellar, and I was bummed. I realized that, if I want to get anywhere, I need to be willing to throw myself out there and make mistakes so I can learn and fix them! Holding back is a sure-fire way for me to stay mediocre.
So. I am taking the advice of some lovely people and sprucing up my website, creating an Etsy page to sell prints, and establishing a logo and cohesive theme for my little fledgling business, if you can even call it that.
With love and establishing myself as an artist or photographer or something,
Megan
This is a long post. But it involves me hitchhiking and nearly being stranded in southern Italy, so it has potential to be interesting. And it involves this place:
This morning, I went through my routine (established recently) of waking around 10, grabbing fruit for breakfast and heading upstairs to what I have now deemed "my office," the room above the garage which has become a really peaceful retreat. I opened my laptop and checked my e-mail (something I have become all too obsessed with). It's like the real mail, but more frequent. You hope to find something personal, something to brighten your day or some update you've been waiting on. *Cough* updates from the IMB about training *cough* But usually I get coupons to Borders and reminders from mint.com that your account is dangerously low. (Since when is $117 dangerously low? Mint.com, you don't know my life!!)
But THIS morning was one of those mornings that delighted me.
I had a facebook message (written in Italian) from a gentleman from Roccanova, Italia, who I learned is a Viola (family!). I quickly mustered my rusty Italian skills to reply to his message. I was so excited to have a little slice of Italy back in my life. This reminded me that I don't think I ever blogged about my Roccanova experience-- only THE singular most meaningful travel adventure of my life thus far. The full story usually takes me about twenty minutes to tell, so I'll make this a simplified version.
My freshman year of college, I took a first-year-seminar that was essentially a huge family history project. We spent the whole semester tearing through census records, conducting interviews with grandparents and compiling information about our genealogies. I was
particularly fascinated with my paternal grandmother's family, the Viola family. They immigrated to the U.S. from Italy in 1888. Gaitano (I think-- I don't have my notes with me) was a musician from a tiny town called Roccanova in the province of Basilicata in southern Italy.
When I studied in Florence in Fall 2007, I thought it would be really great if I could make it there as a sort of "pilgrimage," to take photos and see the town my family hails from-- maybe even meet some Violas if they still lived there. So in November, I got the guts to purchase a bus ticket to Senise, a nearby town. I would then take a local bus to Roccanova. No one could put up the 80 euro to come with me, so it was just me, traveling nine hours by bus to rural southern Italy. As I boarded the bus from Florence, I was terrified. I watched the familiarity slip away until I drifted into sleep on the overnight bus.
At 7 a.m., the bus dropped us off at a gas station on the side of a bypass. I figured it was right outside of Senise, and that I could walk to catch the next bus. I stepped into the gas station's bar and ordered a cappuccino. As I stirred sugar into my coffee, I asked the bartender where I could catch the bus to Roccanova. His reply?
"Non c'e."
There is no bus.
I am nine hours away from Florence on the side of an Italian highway. No one here speaks English, and the Italian spoken in the south is pretty different from that spoken in the north. Initiate freakout.
"Can I walk to Roccanova?"
"No. It's a dozen kilometers away."
That's when a gentleman offered to give me a ride. He was going to Roccanova anyway. I realized this was my only means of making the trip worthwhile. So I said, "ok" and for the first time in my life I hitchhiked.
When I got to Roccanova, I was introduced to a guy named Ernesto. He took me to the town center. We flipped through dozens of handwritten record books, searching for any records of my ancestors. Finally we stumbled upon the record of Matildo Leonardo Viola. The record even indicated that his father was a musician (which I had gathered in the research I did for class).
So Ernesto took me to a restaurant, the owner of which was a Viola himself. We talked and figured out how our families were connected (one brother way back when stayed in Roccanova, while the other immigrated to the States-- we're descended from their respective families). So I ate lunch with their family, and they fed me TONS of homemade pasta and cookies, and I made my way back to Senise with a ton of photos and some serious joy from meeting family I never knew existed, in a tiny town where my great-great-great grandfather grew up.
Thennn it got interesting!!!
I got a ride with Ernesto back to Senise, and I had like 7 hours to kill before the bus picked me up. I called the bus company just to make sure I was waiting in the right place, and the woman on the phone told me to wait in the piazza with the fountain. (Ok, it's a small town, and in the center there's a piazza with a fountain. Check.) Because it was cold outside, I went into a few bars and restaurants ordering pizza or tea, just to stay warm. I ended up in a bar where two women just started talking to me. (In my experience, Italian women had never expressed any interest in speaking with me.) So we talked about where I'm from, and about my adventure that day. When I spoke to them further, they realized I was waiting for the overnight bus back to Firenze.
Angela, who was pregnant and actually owned the bar, said, "You know the bus doesn't come into the city, right?"
"Umm... what?"
"The bus comes to an old piazza with a fountain outside the city. It's not safe for you to walk out there alone, in the dark."
"Umm... what?"
At this point, the women's husbands and a few other friends show up. They were about to go to Angela's house for dinner. One of Angela's friends used my phone to call the bus company. Sure enough, the bus would arrive at the deserted piazza outside of town, in the dark.
I excused myself briefly and went into the bar's tiny bathroom, where I promptly hyperventilated and fought back tears of stress and fear. Aside from the fact that I hadn't spoken a word of English all day, I was nine hours away from anything familiar. I was so afraid.
I came back out slightly more composed, and Angela said, "Come to our house for dinner, and we will give you a ride to the bus."
Still terrified, I nodded and smiled. I was relieved at the generosity of these strangers, but super nervous. It's typically a no-no to hitchhike and chill at a stranger's house, but I knew that I would be able to trust these people. Especially Angela, who was sweet, friendly, and who exhibited such an innocent curiosity about my life.
So I hopped in their car and went to their home. It was remarkably similar to an American home-- lots of picture frames and bookshelves, a dining room table, etc. We sat around and talked (I attempted to talk and take things in with my somewhat limited Italian skills). They cooked an UNBELIEVABLE meal of fresh bread and seafood pasta. The men skinned and cut up the fish (including those tiny octopi) and cooked them in the fireplace. It was such a sweet gathering of friends for what seemed like a weekly dinner-- each person brought something, and they all cooked together. After talking over dinner, Angela and her friend Nicholas drove me to the bus stop. I felt a huge surge of relief when the bus pulled up, with "Firenze" glowing in red letters above the driver's seat. Home. I hugged my new friends goodbye and made it back home to Florence in one piece!!!
(Seriously, I would have been stranded if not for divine providence and incredibly generous Italians. Best adventure ever. Also gave my mom a near heart attack.)
With love and glad for adventures,
Megan
After celebrating a friend's certification as an R.N., I drove home around midnight, windows down. As I drove, I kept seeing beautiful scenes that I wanted to capture with my camera: backlit steam rising from wet pavement, an old shed lit by a single bulb in the middle of a dark field, a deer grazing along the side of the road. When I got home, I decided to try for some lightning photos. This is the best I came up with. It looks like silly string, but whatevs. It's a start.
On my way home from a portrait session this afternoon (my first family session, and not one with stellar results), I drove past the Duke campus. My mind instantly flashed back to my senior year of high school, when college applications and entrance essays were at the forefront of my mind. I only applied to two schools: State and Carolina. And I graduated with a double-major in photojournalism and psychology. I didn't graduate from college with an incredible GPA, but I worked like crazy throughout school. But driving past the Duke campus made me wonder, what if I had worked harder? What if I had applied to other schools? What if I had graduated with a 3.5 or a 4.0? I could have gotten into an incredible graduate program if I had focused more on my grades. I called my mom and she quickly talked some sense into me, "you are doing what you love, what you are made to do," she said.
I know that my education continues throughout the rest of my life. I know I can educate myself by reading and really living. And I know that God has beautiful things for me, and in those things, I can create the kind of life I want. I just wonder what my life would have been like if I'd done things differently.
I am quite certain that I will love my new job. I am so ready for October to be here so I can hit the ground running with it.
I may not make sense at all.
I just started a Beth Moore study. I'm real excited about the Old Testament.
With love and lightning,
Megan
I did the following:
Got up, pinned my hair back and put on a new outfit.
Got bagel and coffee at Panera on the way to Durham.
Learned how to do portraits with Annie's portable studio equipment
Learned that I'm getting business cards, and am now officially an "Associate Photographer" of Annie Harrison (how fancy!)
Quit my job as a waitress, because 1. I am an awful waitress, and 2. I make no money there
Drank a peach milkshake (although I was disappointed because Cookout has yet to start making watermelon milkshakes)
Went to Rachel's house and watched TV and chillaxed and it felt like summer
Rode in Rachel's sister's NEW CONVERTIBLE BUG. Oh my gosh, the FREEDOM AND WONDERFULNESS that is riding in a convertible!!!! Hollly. When I come back from Europe and my car is likely dead (he has 170,000 miles on him and he's acting funny) I will seriously consider this.
On the way home I was really pensive. I examined my life as of late, and tried to decide what has been bugging me concerning boys and singleness and the idea of relationships and life. I ended up driving past my house and going out to Wake Forest. I got out of the car and took pictures in a grove of tall pine trees, and it was refreshing when I finally got in the middle of this grove. It was just me. I couldn't see the road, and it was just me and the trees and the sun and it was nice. I think I might make it a habit to get out into nature alone.
I am currently cleaning my room. Then I will make fresh salsa (really just cut up tomatoes, avocado and peppers with lime juice) and watch the OC.
GREAT DAY!
With love and goodness,
Megan
Francie stood on tiptoe and stretched her arms wide. "Oh, I want to hold it all!" she cried. "I want to hold the way the night is-- cold without wind. And the way the stars are so near and shiny. I want to hold all of it tight until it hollers out, 'Let me go! Let me go!'"
"Don't stand so near the edge," said Neeley, uneasily. "You might fall off the roof."
"I need someone," thought Francie desperately. "I need someone. I need to hold somebody close. And I need more than this holding. I need someone to understand how I feel at a time like now. And the understanding must be a part of the holding." -A Tree Grows in Brooklyn, p. 404
"The last time of anything has the poignancy of death itself. 'This that I see now,' she thought, 'to see no more this way. Oh, the last time how clearly you see everything; as though a magnifying light had been turned on it. And you grieve because you hadn't held it tighter when you had it every day.'" -A Tree Grows in Brooklyn, p. 476
"We sell our love like it was fresh lemonade, we yell as cars go by. Run up to strangers as we tug at their coats and plead with them to try." -Speechwriters, LLC
I have an irrational love for the beach. I tell people that the beach makes me feel akin to Alec Baldwin in that episode of Friends where he's overly excited about EVERYTHING. You know the one.
It's just a combination of all these wonderful tiny things happening simultaneously. And I want to list them because maybe it will feel like I'm back at the beach.
-The ocean. It's so huge and miraculous and calming to me.
-The feeling of calm/smallness when you're in the ocean looking out, and you see nothing but vast, vast ocean and sky. Especially if the clouds are good.
-Tan lines
-Sun warming your skin
-Constant cooling breeze
-Getting out of the cold water and laying in the sun to dry off
-Salty, sandy, messy hair
-Those partly cloudy days where the sun bakes you, but then a cloud comes and gives you a little bit of shade and cool.
-Tiny children strutting around in the sand!!!
-Seashells
-Getting into a lovely book
-The range of motion you have when you're swimming.
-Jumping over really big waves, or swimming through them
-When you lay on your stomach and close your eyes, and you get the ambient sound of the ocean, families playing and lifeguards whistling at people to get away from the pier
I really love that life is dotted with these moments-- things that are really beautiful. I am starting to get past my materialistic self a little bit and see that I don't have to buy a shirt or a pair of earrings at Target to have something pretty. I can take it in everywhere, and if I have my camera, I can preserve that moment of beauty forever.
Just thoughts.
With love and finishing A Tree Grows in Brooklyn (FINALLY!),
Megan
I think it's funny how we think we know so much about loving people. Because, clearly, we are not doing it right.
My Bible Study was in Mark 9 this week, and our discussion landed on verses 36-37: "Taking a child, He set him before them, and taking him in His arms, He said to them, 'Whoever receives (welcomes) one child like this in My name receives Me; and whoever receives Me does not receive Me, but Him who sent Me.'"
First of all, "welcome" in the Greek here means to care for, finding out their story and meeting their needs-- not just greeting them and moving on with life. And we're supposed to welcome them in Christ's name-- love them in the way He loves. One girl in my small group put it like this: Christ valued each of us enough to lay down His life for us. If we love in that kind of way, we should treat others as if we owe them our lives.
That means sacrificial giving. That means seeking out peoples' needs and meeting them-- the hungry, the poor, the sick, even the overtly self-righteous and ungrateful. Treating everyone with the kind of honor and respect that Christ Himself deserves.
Who does this?? Not me.
Can you imagine what the church would look like if we all did this? Christianity wouldn't have such a bad rap, and people would want to be a part of this kind of community. More importantly, we would ACTUALLY be reflecting the love of Christ, which is the way it SHOULD be!
ALSO, while I'm on my interwebs soapbox, someone brought up the point that corporate worship (i.e. Sunday morning) is not meant to be social time. Churches tend to be so clique-y! So get to know people, welcome those who are new, encourage and minister to your congregation. Have social hour some other time during the week, and include people!
What this means for Megan:
-getting over my fear of people; introducing myself to strangers at church-- I went to The Summit for months and had no one to sit with. I knew no one. It sucks, and I know there must be lots of visitors who feel that way right now. I need to be that person that I needed, if that makes sense.
-Honor people, and seek to meet their needs, not mine. Serve, dangit!
-Go above and beyond in taking people in/caring for them. Make sure people know they are loved and accepted. Pour out myself.
Sigh. I feel like God intends for the Church to be so much different than it actually is. So much more of a community. I adore my church, and I think it does a fantastic job of outreach. But I feel like, as God's people as a whole, we're so far from being a serious community of true servants.
Take care of widows and orphans.
Love love love love love.
With love and too many thoughts at too late at night,
Megan
Hi, my name's Megan, and I'm a Carolina graduate who can't even wait tables.
Today was a recovery day. I worked at my new job all weekend (I'm a server at The Twisted Fork), and last night proved that I am the worst waitress ever. I totally screwed up a man's whole meal, and I felt like a total moron. It was really, really bad.
But God has ways of turning that kind of stuff around. I got home and talked to fun people until late at night (including a phone call from Em, my fellow insomniac, at 2:30 a.m.), watched a little Dorm Life and slept till noon. When I woke up, I sleepily shuffled my bare feet down the stairs and into the kitchen. I opened the refrigerator door and there was a whole container of fresh blackberries. I went to the counter and found one perfectly ripe banana and a peach. Perfect! I threw some cherries in, too. I feel so much better when I eat fresh, unadulterated fruit and vegetables (I made homemade salsa for dinner). I seriously need to start buying just produce and minimal non-natural foods. I feel noticeably better when I eat like this-- straight from nature, no processed junk.
So I sat down, watched a travel show on Brussels, read Real Simple, and went to the library with Emily. It was a good day. Tomorrow will be a photo workday. Parking my butt in a coffee shop for quite a while.
I really love summer.
With love and needing to unpack from college,
Megan
I love this photograph. A lot. I really want to get a lot of books read this summer. I'm in the middle of A Tree Grows in Brooklyn, which I like a lot-- I think? There are SO many books I feel like I must read in order to be a well-rounded person.
Two things have been on my mind: ready?
1. I am tired of technology. I know technology is my friend and all, but I just wish I could escape it. Whatever happened to snail mail and phone calls? I really wish it wouldn't damage my life to just give up internet access for a good while. But alas, my life depends on e-mail and keeping in touch with people via 10,000 modes of electronic communication. As Drew Barrymore puts it in He's Just Not That Into You, it's exhausting.
2. This may be totally wimpy for me to say (and please give me your input, happy blog reader), but I don't know that I could make wedding photography my career while I'm single. It makes me feel incredibly weak to say that. And don't get me wrong-- my heart fills with joy for these couples whose weddings I photograph. Their love is so precious and beautiful. But the effect of seeing SO MANY couples who are truly, blissfully happy together makes me feel WAY more alone than I actually am. Maybe that's the two-weddings-in-one-weekend talking. Does that make me the weakest person on the planet? Because that's how I feel. I so don't want to be like that.
In that same vein, here's a passage from A Tree Grows in Brooklyn I thought was good. Note to self: don't settle for a man you really love, who doesn't really love you.
"Johnny gave her a courtesy dance... Feeling his arms around her and instinctively adjusting herself to his rhythm, Katie knew that he was the man she wanted. She'd ask nothing more than to look at him and to listen to him for the rest of her life. Then and there, she decided that those privileges were worth slaving for all her life. Maybe that decision was her great mistake. She could have waited until some man came along who felt that way about her. Then her children would not have gone hungry; she would not have had to scrub floors for their living and her memory of him would have remained a tender shining thing. But she wanted Johnny Nolan and no one else and she set out to get him."
Now it is 1 a.m. See what technology is doing? Ruining my life and depriving me of sleep. Never mind that I have free will or anything.
With love and wanting to get the idea of marriage out of my head for now,
Megan
Summer always makes me appreciate the fact that I live in the South. It makes me wish I lived in the Deep South, by the bayou beneath trees draped with spanish moss, but North Carolina is wonderful and has fewer mosquitoes. I get really nostalgic at the thought of sweet tea, sitting on the porch, fishing, and just taking it slow during the summer. The South has its own character, and I love that. I must confess that during my week without an iPod, I might have listened to some country music, which has reinforced that sentiment.
I decided to read through Daniel in the next couple of weeks. I'm pretty excited about it, because I haven't studied it in a while. I'm thinking about buying the Beth Moore study on it. Maybeeee.
This is what I want to do this summer:
Learn to paint.
Study the Bible lots.
Have FUN with some of my favorite people. Already happening.
Lots of beach trips.
Get some vitamin D
Eat and drink healthy things.
The end.
With love and a new Bible,
Megan
Sometimes I think I am very good at being single. I like the freedom. I like being unattached. Because I can see myself moving to Prague for a couple of years, then traveling who knows where doing something else wonderful and adventurous and new. No ties.
But then I think about how great it would be to share those things with someone, to be with someone whose heart is equally infused with the love of travel and adventure. To walk along the Cliffs of Moher looking out over the sea, to trek across India or sip coffee in a Swedish coffee shop. And suddenly I am just as lonely as the girl who cries, "I just want a boyfriend." Except that it's not just some guy I want, it's The Guy.
I think it would be nice to have a relationship that embraces freedom. Maybe that's completely unrealistic. But to trust each other enough to give the other space, and at the same time know that you need each other and you are wholly committed to each other... I think it would be cool.
But I'm still thrilled to be embarking on this adventure on my own. I don't really think I'd have it any other way. I don't know what I want, really.
But I do know that if The Guy had an accent, I wouldn't mind.
With love and being a silly girl,
Megan
I'm sitting on my roof (enjoying the faint scent of honeysuckles and the blinking of 2 lone fireflies), and I'm exhausted. Today I shot my first wedding as a second shooter with Annie Harrison. Things did not go as anticipated. This is how I am feeling right now:
(in other words, like a big fat wedding photo failure)
I want to be good. For real. How is it that I still have SO MUCH trouble with off-camera flash? Oh yeah, because I hate it and use it as little as possible. And HOW is it appropriate for me to still mess up exposure? Note to self: learn how to use light, ya ninny. You have a degree in this.
I also had my eyes opened to the fact that I need equipment. Like woah. I do not have a decent flash. I do not have any lenses that are low-light-situation-appropriate. And, on top of this, my shutter died immediately following the ceremony, rendering my camera unusable (good thing Annie had a spare). But that will be like 400 bucks to repair!
Oh, Jesus. Remind me that my life does not depend on money. Money frustrates me anyway.
Anyhow, here's some shots from today. Yay for learning experiences!
With love and life lessons,
Megan
(Confession: once I sang that song for an a capella group audition. It was silly but fun. And way embarrassing.)
I love the pieces in this Etsy shop. I want to hang like 10 of them in my house. Art + Words = Lovely.
I can't wait till I live abroad. I feel like I'll collect so many treasures and photos and memories, that my senses will be maxed out from everything I want to soak in, and I'll flop into bed at night knowing I'm living an adventure. How perfectly orchestrated it all would be-- doing a job that I love, that isn't the same day in and out, loving people and ministering to them, demonstrating the Gospel to them, all the while living in one of the most beautiful cities in Europe?
Why are we prone to think that God doesn't want to bless us?
"If you then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good gifts to those who ask him!" Matthew 7:11
(With an exclamation point, mind you.) This week, I have been so overcome with worry-- what if something goes wrong and I won't get to go to Prague? I'm honestly expecting something to mess it up. It frustrates me that my default mode of thinking is so self-sabotaging. God knows my willingness to be a part of missions, He knows my potentially excessive desire to live abroad for a few years. Why don't I trust that He wants good for be because He loves me?
At choir tonight we talked about a man who passed away last week-- He was an active member of the choir, and when he asked friends to pray for him in his sickness, he would say something like, "pray for the one whom Jesus loves." And he'd point to scripture, affirming his identity as a precious son of God. I hope that I come to the point where it's second nature to say of myself, "I am the one whom Jesus loves." Life must be SO much better when we embrace that truth. Why is it so difficult?
Oh yeah, because satan's a jerk.
But here's to believing, anchoring my hope in the Lord, and embracing my identity as a treasured, loved child of God, believing He wants good for me because He loves me deeply.
With love and a summer waitressing job,
Megan
Currently wanting to live in: this photo
Can I take a moment to briefly sing the praises of Mint.com? Because I need serious help with budgeting, and when you link it to your bank account it shows you how much you spend on food, gas, entertainment, shopping, etc. by automatically sifting through and categorizing your checking acct. transactions! Amaaaazing! I always ask WHERE my money goes, and Mint is all, "let me show you!" AND it's free.
I am thankful for my friends. I love them dearly.
I think today I might drive around and take pictures, because that's fun and therapeutic. Maybe this evening.
Ooh, and I'm second-shooting my first wedding this weekend! I'm quite excited!!!
(Please note that it is now 7:52. I woke up at 6:15 and couldn't go back to sleep. WORST FEELING EVER, because I only got like 5 hours of sleep!)
I have nothing really substantial to say, other than I need a new pair of jeans, and I'm glad summer's here.
And my Toms came in the mail. I have happy feet.
With love and things to do,
Megan
